the music stirs me as i walk
through snow washed streets
my son has begun his journey
i have built the road he will follow
till he picks up the shovel to build his own
he will be great at what he desires
his drive is like mine
his focus is like hers
he is a painting of us both
so he will wander through life
dabbling in this and that
curiously learning hows and whys
till he becomes wise
his mind already explores
the what, when, who, where, and why
but he lacks the focus to decipher the solutions himself
so he looks to me for answers
and its ok for me to say I DONT KNOW
i dont know why
i dont know where
i dont know who
i dont know when
i dont know what
what ever it is
we can together find out
right now he's working out
the why's of his family
WHY is mommy and daddy not together
WHY is mommy and sister going away
WHY am i here alone
WHY sadly i dont have all the answers yet
so sadly i say
you go to school so you cant go with mommy right now
is that a lie, or the truth
WHEN will he see her again
WHERE will we be in a year
WHO will he be in a year
WHAT will be his visions of himself, his family, his world
HOW do i aid in his growth as a young man, a young black man, a young black man filled with angst, and passion
im his dad, his father, his superhero...(his daily affirmation to me)
can i hold that mantle, can i meet his four year old expectations
can i be that strong everyday
and what about his sister, she will develop as a young woman without me there, or really hardly ever there....i will miss our morning affirmations of one another....(good morning daddy, good morning my love....i love you daddy....i love you princess)....this has become my battery to continue on each day through pain, through doubt, through what ever may come about
how do i continue without her here
i breathe, each exhale letting anxiety go, letting the pain go...
i will be here everyday
for her, for him
for me....
I AM A SUPERHERO...i just dont wear a costume
through snow washed streets
my son has begun his journey
i have built the road he will follow
till he picks up the shovel to build his own
he will be great at what he desires
his drive is like mine
his focus is like hers
he is a painting of us both
so he will wander through life
dabbling in this and that
curiously learning hows and whys
till he becomes wise
his mind already explores
the what, when, who, where, and why
but he lacks the focus to decipher the solutions himself
so he looks to me for answers
and its ok for me to say I DONT KNOW
i dont know why
i dont know where
i dont know who
i dont know when
i dont know what
what ever it is
we can together find out
right now he's working out
the why's of his family
WHY is mommy and daddy not together
WHY is mommy and sister going away
WHY am i here alone
WHY sadly i dont have all the answers yet
so sadly i say
you go to school so you cant go with mommy right now
is that a lie, or the truth
WHEN will he see her again
WHERE will we be in a year
WHO will he be in a year
WHAT will be his visions of himself, his family, his world
HOW do i aid in his growth as a young man, a young black man, a young black man filled with angst, and passion
im his dad, his father, his superhero...(his daily affirmation to me)
can i hold that mantle, can i meet his four year old expectations
can i be that strong everyday
and what about his sister, she will develop as a young woman without me there, or really hardly ever there....i will miss our morning affirmations of one another....(good morning daddy, good morning my love....i love you daddy....i love you princess)....this has become my battery to continue on each day through pain, through doubt, through what ever may come about
how do i continue without her here
i breathe, each exhale letting anxiety go, letting the pain go...
i will be here everyday
for her, for him
for me....
I AM A SUPERHERO...i just dont wear a costume
No comments:
Post a Comment