IF YOU'RE NOT CAREFUL

I’m stronger than I look.

I know because I’ve seen

myself from the inside

wimping out

and out and out

to the edges.

don’t make me jump

into anything.

even water, which I love.

if you’re not careful

you might mistake anxiety

for excitement.

it could always be worse.

when I can

I take

a spontaneous nap.

me and the girls wear sunglasses to the playground.

we hold hands across the street

make a chain with our sticky fingers

and it feels good.

someone’s building a bar

beneath a bar

and I keep hearing about it.

keep hearing the chandeliers

shake over my head

the glittering glass clinking in the light.

the ceiling is so far away sometimes.

I’d like to have a drink.

I’d like to say hello.

I’d like to see the details painted

here on the wall.

I’ve done errands around myself in loops

linking my stops together

gathering what I need.

I’ve got to get out.

I’ve got to get my hands dirty.

I’ve got to brush my teeth

before I do anything.